In true 'Malaysia Boleh!' spirit, UMNO will be organising a nationwide competition to compile the world’s longest list of proposed times when the Prime Minister Mahathir Mohamad will retire. This follows a statement by the Prime Minister last October that he will retire when UMNO has younger people supporting the party. This was the latest in a long series of announcements of his impending retirement. Mahathir had earlier promised that he would retire after the Commonwealth Games in 1998. He then announced that he would retire after the Asian economic crisis was over. He then announced that he would retire when the people give him the signal. He then announced that he would retire as soon as he found a suitable deputy Prime Minister.

Various other retirement announcements followed, the latest of which was when he announced the new Cabinet line-up last November and again at the UMNO General Assembly in May, when he said he might retire by the year 2003.

An UMNO spokesman who refused to be named said that the aim of the competition was to provide the Prime Minister with a handy list before he runs out of more excuses for staying in power. UMNO hopes that they could compile a list of at least a few thousand other possible announcements for the Prime Minister’s use before they announce a winning entry. Among the top runners so far are "When the cows come home", "When pigs can fly" and "When hell freezes over".

Readers of 'Not The New Straits Times' can send their entries for the "When Will The PM Retire?" Caption Writing Competition to the Deputy Prime Minister's office.

Sarawak residents warmly welcome Mahathir's announcement that the Bakun Dam project will be revived

Bakun project revived The government announced it is considering the revival of original plans for the RM15 billion Bakun Hydroelectric Project. The Prime Minister said that the government is reviving the project, which was shelved in 1998 by his former deputy Prime Minister …errr .. Anwar Ibrahim. A revival of the project would make it the highest dam in Southeast Asia. Even today, it already holds a world record of sorts. An area of forest the size of Singapore has been cleared, three massive diversion tunnels have been constructed and a resort has built at the site – making it the only three-hole golf resort in the world, with the world’s largest holes.

Mr. Intelligent?

Intelligent transport system to be implemented Works Minister, S Samy Vellu, announced the purchase of RM400 million Intelligent Transport System in the 2001 National Budget. It was not made clear how the system would improve road efficiency, but it is thought that the system will incorporate 'intelligent' features such as automatically detecting the amounts of cash carried in each vehicle, so maximum toll rates can be charged; advising drivers of the longest roundabout routes they can take so they pass through as many toll booths as possible; and identifying alternative routes to toll highways that can be closed down for remedial works.

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