Dalil 1: Mahathir does not want to be placed at the same
level as a bankrupt 32-year old virgin and a stained mattress
Dalil 2: He might cause one of the mounted policemen guarding
the court compound to fall off his horse.
Dalil 3: High Court Judge Ariffin Jaka already told him
to stop shooting his mouth off about the Anwar case.
Dalil 4: He might testify that the sodomy was self-inflicted
Dalil 5: The court still remembers Mahathir's famous quote
of 1988: "Hang the lawyers! Hang the judges!"
Dalil 6: He might join the pro-Anwar demonstrators outside
the courthouse and persuade them to march on Seattle
Dalil 7: Like a previous witness, he might not be able
to remember where, what day and what time the sodomy acts were committed
Dalil 8: The Special Branch haven't turned him over yet
Dalil 9: He is abiding by the UMNO Supreme Council's 'No
Testify' Rule
Dalil 10: He'd already testified to Anwar's guilt in numerous
press conferences in Tokyo, New York and London since 1998, apart from
his frequent testimonies over the local newspapers and television
Dalil 11: Tengku Razaleigh might sneak up on him from
behind while he's busy in court and suddenly become UMNO President
Dalil 12: He couldn't understand the subpoena from Anwar's
lawyers because it was in Bahasa Baku
Dalil 13: He'll be away overseas yet again fighting the
foreigners out to re-colonise us
Dalil 14: He does not want to look stupid by repeating
his statement in 1997 that anyone who believed the accusations against
Anwar was "stupid"
Dalil 15: He would not be the first Prime Minister to
appear in court and therefore would not qualify for a placing in the Guinness
Book of World Records
Dalil 16: He's hasn't had time to have all of Anwar's
lawyers charged for sedition yet
Dalil 17: He doesn't have any ties loud enough to match
Ummi Hafilda's outfits
Dalil 18: The last time UMNO was in court, it was declared
illegal
Dalil 19: He does not believe there is a secret political
conspiracy to destroy Anwar - everyone knows it's no secret now
Dalil 20: He is not above the law - he is the law
The remaining 10 Dalils: It's just 10 more campaigning
weeks before the UMNO Elections!
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