Not The New Straits Times

April 2000

Published twice monthly


Thousands run riot in Kuala Lumpur

US criticises police crackdown on demos

Police recover lethal weapon from Reformasi supporter

Opticians donate glasses to NUJ

Human Rights Commission not an April Fool joke

Mahahtir's call to restore democracy not an April Fool joke

Malaysia in danger of losing world record

Melaka Wall to prevent entry of 'bad influences'

Singapore apology media reports

Philippines rejects hostage rescue plan

Foreign Ministry denies G77 rumour

UMNO sends fact-finding mission to Zimbabwe

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UMNO to send fact-finding mission to Zimbabwe
UMNO will be sending a high-level fact-finding mission to Zimbabwe to study ways in which Zimbabwe's ruling ZANU-PF party are silencing the Opposition ahead off polls in the country.

"ZANU-PF has been using many innovative techniques to silence the Opposition," said an UMNO spokesman who refused to be named. "They're bombing Opposition newspaper offices - we just close them down. They actually shoot people wearing Opposition t-shirts - we just get the police to beat them up. There is so much we can learn about democracy from Zimbabwe."

The spokesman said that both countries have much in common and can share experiences. "We both have oppressive governments. We both have economies run by corrupt cronies. We both have ruling parties that have been in power for far too long. We both blame all our troubles on whites. We both have tin-pot dictators clinging desperately onto power at all costs. There is so much we can share and learn from each other."

Much in common: Tin-pot dictators clinging
desperately onto power at all costs

Foreign Ministry denies G77 rumour

IMF protest: Is that Mahathir (red arrow)
in the crowd?

Officials from the Foreign Ministry today denied rumours that Prime Minister Mahathir Mohamad went missing from the first presidential summit of the Group of 77 (G77) in Cuba to join protestors at the IMF demonstrations in Washington last month.

Speculation of his disappearance from the G77 Summit became rife when there was hardly any mention of Mahathir in any of the international press coverage of the event. "This was the ideal opportunity for him to spew out his xenophobic, racist, simple-minded O-level economics to a captive audience," said a political analyst who refused to be named.

"But we didn't hear a peep out of him. Nothing about foreign devils out to recolonise us, nothing about democracy being an evil tool of the West. It was as though the loudmouth wasn't there at all."

"There was some talk about him doing something at the Summit," said a local news editor who refused to be named. "I think he moved a table or tabled a motion or passed motion on a table or something like that. But that was it."

Speculation was rife that Mahathir had actually left the Summit to be with the thousands of protestors attempting to disrupt the International Monetary Fund meeting in Washington at the time. Mahathir had frequently praised the violent anti-WTO protests that occurred in Seattle last year. "I would not be surprised if the Conquering Hero of the Third World and the Scourge of Global Capitalism was not satisfied with just shooting his mouth off in Cuba," said the news editor. "He wanted to be in Washington and kick ass with the demonstrators!"

Unconfirmed reports indicated that, during scuffles between demonstrators and police in Washington, a man looking very much like Mahathir was seen falling off a horse. A toy pistol was recovered from the man.

Speculation is also rife that Mahathir had left the G77 Summit early in protest against the draft declaration that was made at the meeting, which he'd found insulting. The declaration pledged the G77's commitment to democracy and respect for universally recognised human rights and fundamental freedoms.